Dating Your Best Friend's Ex
Should you Date Best Friend's Ex
So you find yourself attracted to your best friend's ex. She is no longer involved with her ex. You didn't pursue him it just happened. Actually you were only trying to get them back together and then -- before you realized it you found yourself falling for the guy. Should you be ashamed? Is this wrong? Can you have a relationship with her ex and still be best friends?
Five Commandments of Best Friendness
Thou shall have no friends before me, Thou shall not covet my boyfriend, Thou shall not steal my boyfriend, Thou shall not bear false witness to me about things concerning my boyfriend, Thou shall keep your hands off my boyfriend. But he's not her boyfriend anymore, so that falls within the grey area, right?
There might be a slim chance that your best friend would not care if you dated her ex. She may even proclaim, "I don't care, have at him." The only time this act really has a success rate is when you get involved with your best friend's ex after she has died. Even then you may have to worry about her catching up with you in the hereafter.
Non-religious Reasons to Stay Clear of Your Best Friend's Ex
If you have to ask yourself if keeping your best friend is more important than scratching the itch that her ex has stimulated -- then you are not her best friend. Yeah maybe you were all friends and you don't want to hurt his feelings, sorry chick that doesn't make a difference. She may have been hurt from the breakup and if you start going out with him that will hurt her even more.
But He is the One, I love him
If you think that his dating her was just an interlude and you are his soul mate then you might want to take the chance of having a relationship with him. It could be worth losing your friend over or demoting the association from BFF to simply friend. But if they were in a serious relationship or married, broke up or got divorced and now he is the man of your dreams, the friendship doesn't have much of a chance of surviving. They were too intimate and no matter the reason for the breakup she isn't going to want you consoling him. She's your best friend -- not him.
A wise man once said that if you can count the number of good friends that you have on one hand you are indeed a lucky person. Another one said true friends are like diamonds, precious and rare. A really smart woman said men are a dime a dozen. And maybe the most famous snippet of wisdom is, do unto others as you would have them to unto you. If you have to ask yourself if this is the right thing to do, then you know down deep it isn't. If you are worried about messing up a great friendship, probably that is exactly what will happen. If your conscience is bothering you, that means you think you are doing or about to do something morally wrong, something that you will surely regret. My feeling on this subject is don't go there, just say no. Keep your pride, keep your head up and keep your best friend.